Our Internet friend Pillock tagged us for a meme that dares to ask …

“What creators who are usually associated with a certain company (or, indeed, medium) would you like to see writing someone else’s title?”

The occasional Friday Night Fight post aside, your humble host must admit his unbridled laziness often interferes with the Fortress’ participation in such events. Heck, we still owe Blockade Boy a “Splotchy” post from a few months back.

Still, the Keeper believes he can muster enough energy from his old, weary bones to pull this post together. Of course, these “dream runs” are not subject to the harsh realities of modern comics. No satanic annulments, Skrull conspiracies or cash-cow countdowns to cataclysmic crises will ever cross into these books. It’s all about solid, imaginative stories and great artwork - or so we hope anyway.

Without further ado, here’s what Marvel & DC would look like if we ran everything. Of course, both companies would go out of business within days, but it would be awesome while it lasted.

• Action Comics - Greg Pak & John Romita Jr. It’s about time the granddaddy of super-hero titles lived up to its name, and few modern writers have shown a greater propensity for action-oriented plots that don’t insult the intelligence. (World War Hulk was the first cross-over we actually enjoyed in years, and the Incredible Hercules is one of the few fun titles remaining in the 616 universe.) Of course, nobody draws kickier-ass comics than JRJR, who has a Kirby-esque understanding of what makes an exciting comic. This team’s Superman would truly fly.
  

• Amazing Spider-Man - Bryan Lee O’Malley & Gabriel Ba You want a 20-something Peter Parker who’s constantly struggling for cash and has no clue how to put his life together? The Keeper can’t think of anyone better for the job than the creator of Scott Pilgrim, comics’ current poster child of aimless youth. Although it would be a hoot to see O’Malley illustrate the web slinger’s all-emo adventures, we can’t help but think that Gabriel Ba’s spider-art would look quite snappy.
  

• Aquaman - Joe Casey & Jose Ladronn Joe Casey respects old-school comics, but isn’t afraid to shake up and subvert super-hero mythology for the YouTube generation. (See Gødland, The Intimates) Ladronn is, well, Ladronn: one of the most inventive illustrators in comics today. The Keeper could just see this pair create a compelling - and truly alien - undersea universe for DC’s sea king. Judging by the pair’s work some time ago on Cable - a run we’ll praise until our dying day - their version of Arthur Curry (the original, not the guy Busiek left high and dry) would be a hero few would compare to the Super Friends‘ version.
  

• Daughters Of The Dragon - Kenichi Sonoda The Gunsmith Cats creator would have to dial down his predilection for underage girls, but Sonoda’s love of firearms, hot-rods and balls-to-the-wall action would suit Misty Knight and Colleen Wing to a “T.” After a depressing conclusion to Marvel’s recent attempt to revive the “Heroes For Hire” brand, one of Sonoda’s trademark thrill-rides would do the characters a world of good and capitalize on the pair’s recent (and awesome) appearances in The Immortal Iron Fist.

• Doctor Strange - Paul Grist As the best super-hero writer/artist in the game today, Jack Staff’s Paul Grist obviously brings much to the table. He creates - and appropriates - great characters to build a unique and exciting universe. His stories are entertaining and challenging; his art as fundamental and exciting as prime Joe Shuster. Plus, Grist knows how to blow a reader’s mind - an essential ingredient to any Doctor Strange run. Despite all the talk of a “broken” Sorcerer Supreme, readers have been treated to great Doctor Strange stories by the likes of Peter Milligan, Mike Allred, Brian K. Vaughan and Marcos Martin. Grist could possibly exceed those talents.
  

• Fantastic Four - Mike & Laura Allred The Keeper will admit his bias up front: We’ve loved just about everything Allred’s ever released. Heck, your humble host would even check out his adaptation of the Book Of Mormon if we stumbled upon a copy. At any rate, he seems like a natural for Marvel’s First Family. The latest issue of Madman probably broke more boundaries than any issue of the FF since … well … geez maybe that Doom story where the villain wore armor made of skin. As Pillock himself noted when he pegged the artist for a Phantom Stranger comic, it’d be like Allred’s issue of Solo each and every month - something we can all agree would make the world a better place.
  

• Green Lantern - Mike Baron & Steve Rude Talk about a natural fit. We’d just love to see the creators of Nexus apply their cosmic sensibilities to the Green Lantern Corps. They could explore DC’s diverse universe and toss Hal Jordan into sticky intergalactic socio-political and crises - situations the greatest Green Lantern is ill-equipped to handle but too noble to ignore. (Kinda like Horatio Hellpop, but with more of a Captain Kirk attitude.) Plus, we all know The Dude knows how to draw beautiful sci-fi backdrops and weird alien races.
  

• Kamandi - Hayao Miyazaki Let’s see, a young boy embarks on a quest to save humanity in a topsy-turvy post-apocalyptic world where animals rule supreme. Sounds like the sort of concept the genius who brought us Nausicaa and Spirited Away could get behind. On a related note, we’d also like to see Battle Angel Alita’s Yukito Kishiro adapt OMAC, One Man Army. Both titles would be a great antidote to the hatchet job Kirby’s Great Disaster received in Countdown recently.
  

• Spider-Woman - Mike Mignola, John Arcudi & Guy Davis With all due respect to Chris Claremont and Fortress fave Steve Leialoha, the Fortress Keeper firmly believes writer Mark Gruenwald and artist Carmine Infantino were the only creators who understood Jessica Drew’s true potential. They turned Spider-Woman into a seductive - yet psychologically flawed - pill-popping heroine who lurked in the shadows of Los Angeles and faced the freakish horrors that exist on the periphery of society. The team that brings us the excellent, and often horrifying, BPRD comic could do a lot with that version of Marvel’s dark angel.
  

• Supergirl - Trina Robbins & Chynna Clugston-Flores Trina Robbins is a comics legend who understands and appreciates the lost art of writing comics that appeal to young girls. (We highly recommend her GoGirl comic, drawn by Anne Timmons.) Chynna Clugston-Flores takes that new-fangled manga style the kids adore and adds her own, uniquely American take. (Blue Monday won us over, although her work on the Johnny DC Legion title is cool as well.) Both creators could undoubtedly return Kara to the every-girl character that made Supergirl such a unique and beloved figure in the Silver Age.
  

• Wonder Woman - Jaime Hernandez The Keeper would love to read about a Wonder Woman who is half as cool as Rena Titanon.

Well, that’s it. In the grand tradition of Warren Ellis, none of these runs would probably last more than 10 or 12 issues. But they’d be great rides while they lasted!

Oh, although the Fortress Keeper isn’t much when it comes to tagging other bloggers for memes, please feel free to participate. We’d love to read others’ “dream teams!”