Perhaps we already forfeited any claim to good taste by defending Brother Voodoo, but it’s time to reveal another deep, dark secret: The Keeper is a big fan of Dirt, the trashier-than-trash tabloid drama starring Courteney Cox.
It’s not because the show is particularly edgy or insightful. Although Dirt aspires to be the Nip/Tuck of the Enquirer nation, Cox (the former Friend is one of the program’s producers) lacks the guts to truly go for the jugular.
The symbiotic relationship between celebrities and tabloid journalism is acknowledged but barely explored. Complicating matters, the actors portraying Dirt’s fictional celebrities do not possess enough charisma to convince viewers they’re anything more than soap opera wannabes.
So why follow Dirt? Two reasons: Ian Hart as schizophrenic paparazzo Don Conkey and Cox herself.
Although Hart has the misfortune of wading through a series of pretentious dream sequences, he inhabits the quirky character with enough skill to give the show a genuine heart, if not a moral center.
Cox will never be confused with Meryl Streep, but she’s a better actress than critics acknowledge.
The Artist Formerly Known as Monica is believeable as the tough, take-no-prisoners Lucy Spiller - a tabloid editor who’s somewhat admirable even though she behaves reprehensibly throughout the series. At the very least, Spiller is honest about her ruthlessness - a trait noticably absent from every other character on the show.
Cox, who appears eager to shed her Friendly persona, delves into the role head-first - taking visible delight in walking over has-been starlets and would-be moguls.
The season finale, which aired Tuesday, left open a few possibilities for improvement if the series returns.
Although the much-hyped kiss between Cox and Jennifer Aniston was barely worth noticing, the presence of another strong star illustrated that Spiller’s character desperately needs a foil.
Aniston’s rival editor - all sugar to Cox’s spice - added a necessary degree of tension to the story. You just knew Jen wasn’t as nice as she appeared, and when her character finally stabbed Spiller in the back it was all the more satisfying.
Although Aniston and Cox are two of Hollywood’s more notable BFFs, you know that “Rachel” has bigger fish to fry. Still, Dirt would do well to find another TV icon capable of going one-on-one with Cox.
Is Heather Locklear available, by chance?
Which leads us to our second point: how Dirt’s big cliff-hanger evoked the glory days of Dynasty and Melrose Place. Rather than try - and fail - to match Nip/Tuck’s scandalous chic, the program should just abandon any pretense of quality and head straight to the soaps.
We already have a Nip/Tuck, after all. What this generation really needs is another Melrose.
