Once Again … Robot Wonder Woman
August 20, 2006 by The Fortress Keeper
Evil Twins Week concludes with the most famous doppelganger of all (well, in the Fortress anyway) - Robot Wonder Woman!
However, this confrontation - courtesy of Wonder Woman #137 - did not resemble the malevolent machine’s umpteen other battles with the Amazon Princess (i.e. team up with a loser like Angle Man, fight Wonder Woman, short-circuit).
No, this time the evil robot picked a battlefield where she held the advantage - a parallel Earth populated by a$$høle automatons!
(Who would create such a world? A robot God?? Would this supreme being need a star-ship???)
A robotic/organic cat-fight subsequently erupts over Steve Trevor, who states his preference for the mechanical Wonder Woman because it is willing to accept his proposal.
Steve is in serious need of therapy …
Robo-Hippolyta (who, like every other construct on the planet, looks like a distant relative of Nick Chopper) decrees the Wonder Women compete in a series of contests to win Steve Trevor’s hand.
First up: Diana vs. The Diana-nator in a no-holds-barred combat. Yes, it’s Robo-Wrestlemania!!
Wow! Diana pulls a near pin-fall on her flaming opponent!! (ECW!!! ECW!!!) Sadly, Mecha-Hippolyta proves to be as corrupt as Vince McMahon and refuses to complete the three-count.
Good thing Robo Van Dam breaks the whole thing up with a metal chair, forcing a draw.
Second contest: Both Wonder Women must fly to the top of a massive tower - which presented a challenge for the Pre-Crisis Diana as she technically couldn’t fly. The Amazon Princess could, however, glide on air currents - which provided a momentary advantage until Robot Wonder Woman kicked turned on the booster jets!
The Silver-Age Wonder Woman was resourceful, though, and managed to end the race in a tie by transforming herself into a human propeller.
Nowadays, Diana would probably just snap the robot’s dang neck. (Ah, realism!)
After another contest that - to be quite frank - only existed so writer Robert Kanigher could fill a few more pages, Hippo-Droid announced her final challenge - A battle to the death!
Complicating matters, the corrupt construct planned to kill Diana anyway if Robot Wonder Woman was defeated!!
Blindfolded (don’t ask) and near defeat, Wonder Woman finally defeats the robotic rival once and for all by using her tiara’s steel-smashing strength™ to blast it to oblivion.
(No wonder Brother Eye hates her …)
Using make-up she keeps in her … um, never mind … Diana disguises herself as Robot Wonder Woman and manages to escape the machine universe.
After all that, Steve finally wakes up from his “hypnotic trance” (yeah, riiiiighht!) and - naturally - asks Diana to marry him again!
That crazy guy! When will he ever learn?
How can you not love Steve?
You have to, because he brought out honest-to-gosh emotions from Wonder Woman. For all you can say about the Post-Crisis Diana, I think the lack of a decent romantic foil has gone a long way toward the current perception that she’s not “human” enough.
Although, nowadays he probably couldn’t get away with the constant proposals. At the very least, there’d be a stern “No means No” lecture!
Steve is more annoying and stupid than lois
Sleestak -
Perhaps, but just as important part of the mythos.
And Golden Age Steve could throw a mean punch, just not as mean as Etta Candy!